No one will read this anyway...

I never thought something like this could become addicting. But it is. Just to sit here and allow myself to ramble on. Its nice in a way. I mean I do have things to say and crap that is always flowing through my mind. Not that I ever say any of my thoughts to anyone. Most likely A: no one cares or B: it really just doesn't matter in the first place and I only think it does because some random thing in our culture or society wants me to think its important. That's the problem with society. Everyone seems to think its something great when really it isn't. Our entire way of life depends on what culture or society thinks is appropriate. How are we to know if what our society or culture thinks is actually correct? There are so many different aspects to everything there is never just a single answer. So how are we to live in a world where white is black and black is white and then there is so many shades of gray that no one can figure out what is. I don't know if this bothers anyone else but it sure as heck makes my head ache...There are so many questions left unanswered...must we always take things without knowing anything about it? Am I not supposed to think for myself without the inhabitions of others controlling every little thing that goes on! What is really at stake if I allow myself to just float on the current of this mad world? Am I to just simply stand by and watch as everyone else actually does something meaningful with their lives? Never to really experience anything, only to read about it and allow my imagination to take over...how boring and pointless this entire blog is. I love how its really not things I care about. Since the things that are truely worth caring about I simply wouldn't be able to discribe. Like friends, family, freedom, truth, justice, etc... this is so pointless.....why do I bother? Nothing is real.

BLARG!

Alright I've never blogged before. but I know people who do and say they enjoy it. so I figured I'd give it a shot... But this heat....isn't enticing to be out in....gods cursed its too hot! 101 today...and for the next four it is supposed to be the same. I love the sun don't get my wrong but holy crap! This is a bit much...I am officially greatful to my father for moving away from California to Washington. Because it would be like this all the time and not just in the summer. I cant wait for winter.

Mindless nonsense

I give into the raging torment of emptiness. Pain is all that can reach that desolate wasteland. And yet I welcome the pain, the hurt, the only thing that I can feel. All else indifferently waites for me to wake up and get over my sarrows. Deep breath...take the plunge...let someone in enough to help. Impossible......