hahahahaha i love my friends

my friends are amazing! lol they make my days go faster at work...stinkin hilarious!

The Pierces

Got a secret
Can you keep it?
Swear this one you'll save
Better lock it, in your pocket
Taking this one to the grave
If I show you then I know you
Won't tell what I said
Cause two can keep a secret
If one of the m is dead…
Why do you smile
Like you have told a secret
Now you're telling lies
Cause you're the one to keep it
But no one keeps a secret
No one keeps a secret
Why when we do our darkest deeds
Do we tell?
They burn in our brains
Become a living hell
Cause everyone tells
Everyone tells…Got a secret
Can you keep it?
Swear this one you'll save
Better lock it, in your pocket
Taking this one to the grave
If I show you then I know you
Won't tell what I said
Cause two can keep a secret
If one of the m is dead…Look into my eyes
Now you're getting sleepy
Are you hypnotized
By secrets that you're keeping?
I know what you're keeping
I know what you're keeping
Got a secretCan you keep it?
Swear this one you'll save
Better lock it, in your pocket
Taking this one to the grave
If I show you then I know you
Won't tell what I said
Cause two can keep a secret
If one of the m is dead…
[spoken]Alison?Yes, Katherine.
I have something I want to tell you, but
you have to promise to never tell anyone.
I promiseDo you swear on your life?
I swear on my life[end spoken]
You swore you'd never tell…
You swore you'd never tell…
You swore you'd never tell…
You swore you'd never tell…
Got a secretCan you keep it?
Swear this one you'll save
Better lock it, in your pocket
Taking this one to the grave
If I show you then I know you
Won't tell what I said
Cause two can keep a secret
If one of the m is dead…(chorus x 3)
Yes two can keep a secret
If one of us is…. Dead.

Romans Chapter 12 Verse 21.

I noticed that my first few blogs were semi-indepth..."deep" one would say...and that over the course of the year have gotten less so. At least to me....but the theme of my blogs I also noticed was emotional sadness...does that mean that I'm happier now-a-days? That could be a possibility......I feel that sometimes I'm more happy. I'm happy that my sisters are moving back here....well Kristie is already here but Melinda too :) But I think that I'm emotionally retarded. I really kinda am, I ignore things or let things that bother me slide and then build up....until I burst. Not something that is healthy really. I like what my friend Matt said to me the other night. I asked him if he was lonely...and he said yes but then added "what is lonely?" Life is in a constant flux of change. You may be lonely one minute but something can alter that perception or feeling the next. We are always in a world of change. Nothing ever stays the same. Except for me at least, the gospel. In an ever changing world the gospel is the one thing I've been able to cling to. I may make mistakes, I do all the time. But with things I've done or not done or may do, I know beyond a doubt that I could never stop believing the gospel. Sometimes I wonder if its a greater fear in what my family would think and do then a fear of God. Sometimes I feel I am evil. That I don't deserve forgiveness. That I have no right to ask Heavenly Father for help or anything else. But I realize that isnt how it should be. And I know I have people that love me and care about me. And want me to succeed in life. I am so grateful for them.

Forgiveness is between them and God. It's my job to arrange the meeting.

Anyone can be an artist... in anything, food, whatever. It depends on how good they are at it. My art is death. And I'm about to paint my masterpiece.

"Do not be over come with evil, but overcome evil with good." That's Romans Chapter 12 Verse 21...I am the sheep that got lost, Madre.

Revenge is a meal best served cold.

A word does not say anything, and at the same time it hides everything. Just as the wind that hides the water, like the flowers that mud hides. A glance does not say anything, and at the same time it says everything. Like rain on your face, or an old treasure map. A truth does not say anything, and at the same time it hides everything. Like a bonfire that does not go out, like a stone that is born dust. If one day you need me, I will be nothing. And at the same time I will be everything. Because in your eyes are my wings, and the shore where I drown. Because in your eyes are my wings, and the shore where I drown.

That's what everybody keeps saying. "I'm just a professional". Everybody keeps saying that to me. "I'm just a professional", "I'm just a professional". I'm getting sick and tired of hearing that.

No, that wasn't a - That was a smirk, that's not a smile. A smirk is different. They both start with "S," but they're not the same

Shoot me please....

I like this guy right. But he keeps messin with my mind.....its getting old real fast. Its weird that I would feel this strongly....since I haven't liked anyone like this since I was dumped a year ago.....so my frustration lies in the fact that I feel this way and I'm irritated at myself....I probably shouldn't like him but I do and that's just......GAH! I don't even know why I'm venting on here.....................FRUSTRATION..................men are dumb. Its true.....I watched "He's just not that into you".....and wow I felt pathetic after.....I really am just.....*sighs* pathetic.

Not that Girl

Hands touch, eyes meetSudden silence, sudden heat...Hearts leap in a giddy whirl...He could be that boy...But I'm not that girl...Don't dream too far Don't lose sight of who you are...Don't remember that rush of joy...He could be that boyI'm not that girl...Ev'ry so often we long to steal....To the land of what-might-have-been...But that doesn't soften the ache we feel When reality sets back in.... Blithe smile, lithe limb ....She who's winsome, she wins him...Gold hair with a gentle curl..That's the girl he chose ...And heaven knows, I'm not that girl...Don't wish, don't start...Wishing only wounds the heart I wasn't born for the rose and pearl There's a girl I know...He loves her so...I'm not that girl...

chillin

at matt's house. he's ridiculous........

hahaha

I wasn't saying that you guys had no say. I was merely explaining why I said them. I don't care about the comments I just think its funny that we are having an argument on who in the family is the prettiest. :P absolutely ridiculous. Since we are all daughters of God...we are all pretty in our own right...but in the family...you two are the prettiest. BAM!

Secretary

Being a secretary is rather nice. I get to visit with random people, type all day and use my creative talents to think up ways of how to get out of the room. Ironic really. I do enjoy my job though. And since its at the college I get to see friends that I wouldn't normally talk to or see....and I'm making friends with the tutors here also! Its a lot of good fun. And I rather sit on my butt "working" then sit on my butt at home not doing anything at all :P But that's how it goes.
Lets see.....some things that are new in my life......I have a job...I'm pleasantly content at the moment with life. I may be irritated all the time but at least I'm not seething with rage. My typing abilities are much faster now that I have been typing for a few days straight. I get to design things to go up in the room I'm working in. It'll be a lot of fun! And my boss is pretty awesome not gonna lie. And Edrease is hilarious to work with. (He's best friends with my cousins). I'm very grateful that I got this job. It pays well and its only part time, which allows me to work but then have most of the day to do things.

geez

Dispite what my sisters may think...I am not the prettiest in the family. And two, I said it was an insecurity. I might feel that way. Its a possibility. Doesn't make it true or whatever, but still you need to relax a bit. This is kinda like my online diary. I am merely venting on how I feel at the moment. So please don't take what I say on here personally. Especially since its my feelings on the matters that I'm typing about. They may have no basis or facts. Simply feelings or impressions.

tired

I really kinda hate life....not always...sometimes life is good but for the most part its kinda sucky...what a sad realization. It seems I need to change that aspect of myself. I need to stop lookin at everything as if it was horrible...I used to have such a bright outlook on life. I was excited for the future and what it had for me. What changed? why is it different now? Why did I let my pain wrap around me like a sodden blanket that wont let go? Interesting....Why wont I let it go...what's wrong with me? Is it my deep insecurities....I'm not as beautiful as the rest of my family, I'll never look like that, can't anyone love me who doesn't have to?.......No one can know me....not the real me....I put up a barrier every time. One or two people actually know how I am...only one has actually accepted me. I don't know if I can take it anymore. Always pushing people away...

cramps suck

yes they really do

sad thoughts

I guess I thought you'd be here forever...Another illusion I chose to create. You don't know what you got until it's gone.... And I found out just a little too late. Now being without you....takes a lot of getting used to...I should learn to live with it...but I don't want to! Living without you...is all a big mistake. Instead of getting easier...It's the hardest thing to take.............

deep thoughts?

Turning, twisting, writhing against invisible restraints....longing to be released....raging in silence. wanting to scream...lips sealed shut...jaws clenched...muscles rigid with tension.....this would be the monster in me...waiting.......insanity looming....magnificence is waiting to be revealed...but hides away in the deep recesses of my mind....aching to come to the surface....resistance built up....

Rationally none of this is real. But feelings are rarely rational.