New Beginings

Isn't it always hard to make a new start? I feel like people get into this funk of not wanting to change but wanting to change at the same time. For example, I would like to live a healthier lifestyle, not only for myself but for my children, but even though I want that, I have zero desire/motivation to get started. I know what I have to do, I know what needs to be done and I just dont want to do it but do at the same time. Why is change so dang hard? It is a neccissity. Change is nature. We have to if we want to progress in any sort of way. And yet, knlowing that, it is still difficult! It can be so scary to begin anew, even when you know its a good thing to do. I think there is that fear of failing at the new thing but also fear of disappointing others too. My husband it starting a new job and though he knows its a better opportunity, and a neccissity for our family to be better provided for, he is still worried. He's afraid of disappointing his current boss with the news he's leaving along with the fear of starting a new job. One that he will be trained for. I have every faith in my husband, he loves his family and doesn't take the responsibility as a provider lightly. But I know how difficult this change will be for him. He loves his job and the people he works with. And he doesn't want to leave them without help but I have to remind him that that isn't his job. It just proves to me what kind of person he is. Not that I need convincing, I know what kind of person my amazing husband is. I am grateful for his love, his kindness and for his hardworking spirit.

Long TIme

Well, look what I found here! A blog I haven't written on in ages. Some catching up may be in order. I have 3 children, 2 boys and a girl. Time is flying by and I can't seem to slow it down any. I used to think that growing up would take forever. And as a child, it seemed to take forever, but now that I have children....it seems to be in a rush. I want to savor these moments with my kids. They are learning and growing so quickly! I used to think that my kids would be babies forever and that I would have all the time in the world to spend with them, watch them play and grow. Now all I can say is that they are growing at such a rapid pace! My youngest is already turning 2 and is beginning to speak so much more. My middle one is already registered for kindergarten and my oldest is going into 3rd grade! How has it come to this point already?! In just a few short years all my kids will be in school and I can only imagine how lonely I'll feel. I know I'm being selfish, but I want them with me. It's always a fine line of wanting them around constantly and wanting them to grow and experience new things. I wish I could slow the clock down, even if its just for a little bit. The challenge with them growing up so quick is that I am sad but also, I'm excited for their journey. I'm so excited to see what kind of teenagers and young adults these incredible humans will become. I'm excited for the next phase of their lives. I'm stoked that I'll get to help them navigate some of the hardships I know they'll face because I've been there before. I trust that these young spirits I've been entrusted with will continue to florish and become wonderful people. I just hope I don't mess them up too much. I have a very blessed life. I am grateful for the amazing children I have been given and the wonderful man I get to spend eternity with. I used to dream about what my life would look like as a teenager. I used to wonder what married life would be like or what kind of mom I'd be. Or how many kids I'd have. Funnily enough, my life looks nothing like I thought it would as a kid. I triuly had no concept of what it meant to be a mother or wife. I honestly don't know what I was thinking before, but I can say, my life is better than I ever thought it could be. I'm not saying that I don't have troubles or trials, I do. But all of it pales in comparison to the joy I've been given. It's humbling to look at the blessings I have in my life and it makes those trials a lot easier to work through. I love my husband and children. I'm thankful families are forever.